7 Days and 7 Nights

THU.MAY 11

Screening: Reel Venus Film Festival Showcase

Launched in 2003, the Reel Venus Film Festival is a three-day event that showcases an eclectic body of film and video shorts, directed by emerging and established women filmmakers and video artists from the U.S. and abroad. Their work pushes traditional boundaries through storytelling methods that inspire, entertain, inform and provoke audiences with challenging topics, themes and images. Tonight’s screening includes an hour’s worth of selected shorts from previous Reel Venus Film Festivals. Bluestockings, 172 Allen St. btwn. Stanton & Rivington Sts. 212-777-6028 7 p.m. $5-10 suggested.

Proudly Funded

Cedar Lake Dance Ensemble’s Artistic Director Benoit-Swan Pouffer’s “Hammer” is a theatrical, vigorous and imaginative narrative inspired by Friedrich Nietzsche’s “Twilight of the Idols,” and his philosophical concept of challenging life with a hammer. Driven by an original score from Stefano Zazzera and video by Adam Larson, Pouffer uses remembrances from his childhood to explore the need to find and understand one’s own hammer device. Perhaps he’ll take some deserving metaphoric aim at pompous ex-pat William Forsythe, the American so in love with Germany that last week his troupe suggested this company was somehow wrong or bad for taking money from Wal-Mart. What’s wrong with corporations making contributions toward art? May 11-13, 18-21 at 8 p.m., Sat. at 2 p.m and 8 p.m., Sun. at 2 p.m. Cedar Lake Theater, 547 W. 26th St., btwn. 10th & 11th Aves. $30, $10 students/seniors at 212-868-4444 or SmartTix.com.

FRI.MAY 12

Sonic Channels

This electro-acoustic concert features a wide range of recorded works and live performances—instrumental and dance—by sound artists and composers from around the world. The pieces, curated from an international open call for works by composer Melissa Grey and sound artist Jim Briggs, provide an additional layer of meaning to LMCC’s exhibition “Channels: New Media Publics” by responding to sub-themes of how public and semi-public spaces are perceived, mapped, constructed, deconstructed, and theorized through the filters of media. 7 p.m. at LMCC, 15 Nassau St. $5 suggested; reservations at GreyM593@newschool.edu.

Berlioz & Bernstein

For their final concert this season, The Collegiate Chorale presents “A Joyous Celebration,” a program featuring Hector Berlioz’s “Te Deum” and Leonard Bernstein’s “Chichester Psalms.” Joining the Orchestra of St. Luke’s and conductor Robert Bass are The Canticum Novum Singers, The University at Buffalo Choir, the Brooklyn Youth Chorus, and tenor Vinson Cole for the performance of these choral works. “Te Deum”is the last of Berlioz’s major architectural works, composed throughout 1848 and 1849, in which massed instrumental and vocal forces are used by the composer in order to exploit alternately colossal and intimate sonorities in a vast, spacious acoustic. The work sets the traditional Latin text and employs a solo tenor, triple chorus, and orchestra. “Chichester Psalms” was commissioned by the Very Reverend Walter Hussey, Dean of Chichester, for the 1965 Chichester Festival. Serene and affirmative, the work was written during Bernstein’s sabbatical leave from his post as music director of the New York Philharmonic. Carnegie Hall, 57th St. at Seventh Ave. 8 p.m. $20-$ 85 at 917-322-2140 or Carnegie Charge, 212-247-7800.

SAT. MAY 13

Symmetry

“No Lemons, No Melon,” a group art show curated by Gay City News writers and visual artists Carrie Moyer and Sheila Pepe featuring Linda Benglis, Fritz Buehner, Jenny Dubnau, Robert MacDonald, John Monti, Bruce Pearson, Kay Rosen, James Siena, Shellburne Thurber, Anthony Viti, and Carrie Yamaoka. The show revolves around the theme of symmetry. In the precise mathematical sense, the modern definition of symmetry is “immunity to change.” For artists, symmetry’s potential for a kind of ultimate formal resolution is undeniably seductive. So too is the allure of making an object, or image that is seemingly immune to change. Does our own bilateral anatomy create an innate preference for the same? We wonder, considering both the desire for the perfection suggested by immunity, and the beauty that arises in the small failures toward that quest. David Krut Projects, 526 W. 26th Street, #816. 212-255-3094 or davidkrut.com. Tue.-Sat. 10 a.m.-6 p.m, through June 3.

SUN.MAY 14

The Facts of Life: The Lost Episode

Written by LA Weekly Theatre Award-winner Jamie Morris, this unauthorized parody features an all-male cast as the girls from Eastland. The lost episode in question is a two-part, viewer-discretion-advised, musical entitled “The Best Little Whorehouse in Peekskill.” Budget cuts are threatening to force Mrs. Garrett to leave Eastland and the girls will do anything to raise enough money so she can stay. So, they become hookers. And they sing and dance about it! Add an evil Headmaster who has a thing for Mrs. G, lesbian overtones between Jo and Blair, and a guest cameo by cousin Gerri, and it adds up to an unforgettable evening of tragedy and triumph. Directed by Chris Melohn with set design by Michael Lee Scott, “Facts” features lyrics by Brooks Braselman and Jamie Morris with musical arrangements by Hank Bones. Sundays through May 28 at 7 p.m. Ace of Clubs, inside Acme at 9 Great Jones St. at Lafayette St. $17 at 212-352-1010 or TheaterMania.com.

Confessions Dance Party

Identity Lounge/Bar is having a free gay dance party every Sunday night featuring DJ Drew G. The space offers two floors and chic decor with drink specials all night. 10 p.m. at 511 E. Sixth St. btwn. Aves. A and B. No cover charge. 212-995-8889.

Electro Shock Therapy

Something for comedy lovers of every stripe and flavor when Adam Sank welcomes back homo headliner Danny McWilliams of “Funny Gay Males” and “The Joan Rivers Show” to this weekly chuckle-patch, along with straight bad boy Chris McDevitt, and lesbian up-and-comer Anne Neczypor, seen at Carolines and on the Logo Channel. Come watch the latest episode of “Desperate Housewives” on Therapy’s big screen at 9. Stay for the live comedy afterwards. 10 p.m. at Therapy Bar, 348 W. 52nd St. btwn. Eighth & Ninth Aves. No cover, no minimum, $5 cosmos all night. adamsank.com or therapy-nyc.com.

MON.MAY 15

Performing Arts Careers

Out Professionals presents David Diamond, a career coach for people in the performing arts—directors, actors, playwrights, producers, managers, designers, and visual artists, among others. Diamond demonstrates how to create strategies and set career goals, without losing sight of the need to maintain relationships and build financial security. The former Executive Director of Stage Directors and Choreographers Foundation, Diamond has presented the workshop “Directing Your Theatre Career” at California Institute of the Arts, Columbia University, and Carnegie Mellon. $15, OP Members $10. 212-462-9255 or outprofessionals.org. The LGBT Community Center, 208 W. 13th St. 8 p.m. 212-620-7310.

R-E-S-P-E-C-T

GLSEN presents the Third Annual Respect Awards, where some of the leaders who have helped move GLSEN’s work forward will be recognized and honored. New York honorees will include Citigroup and Chairman and CEO Charles Prince, the creative team behind the Tony Award-Winning Broadway musical “The 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee,” and Advocate magazine’s 2005 Person of the Year Kerry Pacer. From Citigroup’s support of LGBT inclusiveness in the corporate workplace, to the diverse student body portrayed in The 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee, to Kerry Pacer’s heroic effort to start a Gay-Straight Alliance at her school in White County, Georgia, GLSEN’s important work is being felt across the country. Come celebrate the outstanding efforts of the 2006 honorees and contribute toward GLSEN’s continuing mission to create safe schools for all students. Cipriani, 55 Wall St. 6:30 p.m. cocktail reception; 7:30 p.m. dinner and awards presentation. Glsen.org.

Tulips & Pansies

Betsey Johnson, Marc Jacobs, Bill Blass, Heatherette, Kenneth Cole, B. Michael, David Rodriguez, and Pamella Roland are just a few of the world-renowned designers participating in this night of fashion and flowers hosted by EXTRA’s Tanika Ray at Village Care of New York’s fifth annual “Tulips & Pansies—The Headdress Affair.” This extraordinary springtime fete brings together top-notch designers, New York’s finest floral designers, performers such as Lady Bunny, and other major New York celebrities to help raise funds for Village Care of New York, a non-profit organization providing vital healthcare programs to people living with HIV/AIDS. Surprise celebrity guests will judge the main event-a festive runway show of floral headdresses made entirely from living plants and fresh cut flowers created by the renowned designers. Bridgewaters at South Street Seaport, 11 Fulton St. 7-10 p.m., headdress competition begins at 8:45 p.m. Tickets starting at $250 at 212-337-5750 or vcny.org.

TUE.MAY 16

Celebrity Art Auction

MIX NYC, the non-profit media arts organization behind the annual New York Lesbian & Gay Experimental Film Festival will kick off its 2006 fundraising effort, The Naked Eye Celebrity Camera Auction, with a blockbuster launch party, presented by award-winning filmmaker/actor John Cameron Mitchell and The L Word’s Daniela Sea. MIX NYC sent brand-new disposable Kodak cameras to maverick filmmakers, indie rockers, sci-fi novelists, Hollywood lights, East Village club kids, and porn auteurs asking each of them to expose the film and return it undeveloped. This unprocessed art will be made available in an exciting online auction. Collectors, fans and friends will have the opportunity to bid on eBay for cameras shot by Gus Van Sant, Laurie Anderson, Alan Cumming, Lucy Liu, Debbie Harry, Scott Heim, Jill Clayburgh, Charles Busch, Todd Oldham, John Cameron Mitchell, Peter Berlin, and more than a hundred others. The launch party will be hosted by Murray Hill, with live music performances by Bitch, Bora Yoon, and Michael O’Neill, and an acrobalancing performance by Rose Calucchia, Alison Bear, and (M) Lollo. Guests will also have the chance to win fantastic prizes, like a free haircut from Tease Salon, free brunch from Prune, COLT studio DVDs, and more. Proceeds from the auction will benefit MIX NYC, producer of the New York Lesbian & Gay Experimental Film Festival, the longest-running queer film festival in New York City. This auction will help to support a bigger and brighter future. $20. DJs spin beginning at 7 p.m. with performances starting at 9:30 p.m. Leslie/Lohman Art Gallery, 26 Wooster St.

Broadway Meets West End

New York Festival of Song, with Artistic Director Steven Blier—who was just awarded the 2006 Vocal Coach of the Year Award from Classical Singer Magazine—and Associate Artistic Director Michael Barrett, will close its 18th season with “Hands Across the Sea.” This program follows the transatlantic drift of the 1920’s and 30’s musical when London and New York carried on an ongoing exchange program of talent and audience appeal—Kern, the Gershwins, Porter, and others mounted musicals in London, while Coward, Novello, et al had their vogue in New York. On both sides of the pond, lyrics were retrofitted to tickle the tastes of their adoptive audiences. Artists include pianist Steven Blier, soprano Lisa Vroman, mezzo Mary Testa, tenor Hal Cazalet, and tenor Jason Graae. Tonight and tomorrow at 8 p.m. at Merkin Concert Hall at Kaufman Center, 129 W. 67th St. $45, $35 for seniors, $ 22.50 for student rush; 212-501-3330 or at the box office.

Comedy Infusion

Come see what everyone is laughing about at “the hottest gay lounge in Hell’s Kitchen.” This week, Robert Keller hosts New York comedy stalwart Danny McWilliams from “Funny Gay Males” on Comedy Central, the uproariously despondent Lisa Kaplan, seen at Gotham Comedy Club, and the hysterically caustic Susan Prekel, seen at the Montreal Comedy Festival, and “Live at Gotham.” 331 W. 51st St. btwn. Eighth & Ninth Aves. 10 p.m. No cover or minimum. 212-974-8030 or vladabar.com.

WED.MAY 17

New Queer Poetry

The literary magazine Bloom presents an evening of new queer poetry with Melanie Braverman (“RED”), Timothy Liu (“For Dust Thou Art”), Elaine Sexton (“Sleuth”) and Yermiyahu Ahron Taub (“The Insatiable Psalm.”) A book signing will follow the readings.For more information call Christopher Murray at 212-620-7310 ext.259 or bloommagazine.org. 7:30 p.m. at The LGBT Community Center, 208 W. 13th St. 212-620-7310. $5 suggested donation

Four Legs Good

Urge Speaker Quinn to support The Pets in Housing Bill, (Intro. No. 13) to ensure tenants’ rights to live with an animal companion. It’s a matter of life or death for thousands of dogs and cats killed yearly due to a lack of homes—and a matter of tenants’ rights to live with a pet. The LGBT Community Center, 208 W. 13th St., Rm. 410. 6-8 p.m. Free. Contact Joyce Friedman of the Humane Society of the U.S. at 718-807-6748 or JoyceLFriedman@hotmail.com.

Sweetwash

Musicians and dancers come together and move apart in a continuing cycle of structured and improvised interactions and spontaneous connections reflecting on the endless possibilities for intimacy found in New York’s pedestrian culture. With songs by composer and singer Eisa Davis and movement by choreographer Nicholas Leichter. Whitney Museum at Altria, 120 Park Ave. at 42nd St. 8 p.m. Free. No reservations. Doors at 7:30.

THU.MAY 18

Anarcha-Feminism

Marta Kolarova will discuss the history and development of the anarchist movement in Czechoslovakia. Special attention will be paid to the anarchist feminist movement, and connections to the global movement and international influences will be addressed. Marta has worked with Reclaim the Streets! and organized protests for Prague 2000. She currently writes for Czech anarchist and anarcha-feminist publications, and is doing research on gender, social movements. and globalization. Bluestockings, 172 Allen St. btwn. Stanton & Rivington Sts. 212-777-6028. 7 p.m. $3 to $5 suggested.

Orpheus

Orpheus is the third in Andrea Lawlor’s Pocket Myth zine series, each riffing a particular Greek—and sometimes Roman—myth. This zine/CD release party features readings, sound arts, and musical performances by Ari Banias, Greta Byrum, Cathy Halley, Sara Jaffe, Lawlor, Robin Coste Lewis, EE Mille, My Invisible, Eileen Myles, Cynthia Nelson, and Cat Tyc. Thursday 7:30 p.m. at Galapagos, 70 No. Sixth St. btwn. Kent & Wythe Aves. $5 at 718-782-5188. Pocketmyths.com.

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